Monday, April 25, 2011


I do not approve of NCMO*.  The act disgusts me.

I don't understand what makes a person either:
a) think so little of themselves that they have to stoop to the level of believing the only way they will be able to have someone of the opposite sex is to give away physical affection without mental connection, or
b) think so little of another person that they use that individual to gratify physical desires - have they no more respect for the person than that?  How selfish.

Neither of these situations shows the respect and love for Heavenly Father's children as He would have us show.

The ironic part to me is that most LDS singles are having these NCMO's within the law of chastity**, which basically means they are getting themselves all worked up with nowhere to go.  Not only are they either abusing themselves or someone else, the end result is somewhat...frustrating to say the least.

So why are you doing it?!  I love you more than to use you or see you be used like that.  Why can't you love yourself enough?  Why can't you see you - the beautiful, respectable purity of you that I see when I look into your eyes?  Why can't you just be true to who you know you are?

I am so saddened by this and I will no longer pretend like it is okay.  You think you are going to find the kind of man or woman you want to spend eternity with through NCMO?  Your quest for companionship is the reason you are degrading yourself to that level, and, yet, I do not believe that what you are doing is realistically going to find you the kind of partner that you long for so deeply, sincerely that you have shed tears upon your pillow countless nights.  I wish I could hold you and share with you how much I love you and how much Heavenly Father loves you and how much the remarkable person you are has touched my life as well as many more than you could ever know.

Please stop.  Please know you are better than that.  Please know I love you.  Please know Heavenly Father loves you.  Please know there is a man or woman out there waiting to be held in your arms.  Someone who wants more of you than to know you selfishly gave away the affection they have been longing for and waiting to have from you.  Please know there is someone waiting to be held in the arms of the individual with whom you are using for your own physical gratification.  Please be as selfless in this quest as I have seen you be in so many others.  Please be true to who you know you are.

This is killing me inside.  I have witnessed potential-filled relationships destroyed by this type of behavior.  I will not tolerate it any longer or pretend as if it is okay.  It isn't.  You deserve so much more.

* Non-Commital Make Out
** Chastity is sexual purity.  Those who are chaste are morally clean in their thoughts, words, and actions.  Chastity means not having any sexual relations before marriage.  It also means complete fidelity to husband or wife during marriage. 


S.R. Braddy said...

It occurs to me that, within the framework of the LDS code of conduct, one can be literally chaste without being virtuous. Indulging in behavior like the NCMO is hardly virtuous and decreases one's ability to resist temptations against the law of chastity.

Unknown said...

I just have to say, first of all, that it is hysterical that you chose that photo to represent the kind of "sincere love and passion" that one wants to look forward to when the story behind the photo is of a young sailor who was literally running amuck kissing everyone he say from old to young and this photographer was trying to run ahead of him to get these photos when he captured this one, which turned into a greater love story... which may have been the greatest NCMO ever...

ha ha ha. sorry larissa. Just thought that was funny!

Unknown said...

(wow, a lot of spelling errors in that) sorry.

Larissa said...

Dang it all! I thought no one would know - of course YOU would. Yes, I know the story behind that picture, I have just always felt it symbolized such great romance and hope. *sigh* Darn you for wearing your smarty pants.

Unknown said...

Well I guess we are all kidding ourselves that although a NCMO may be the epitome of a night of romance to write home about it is just some guy grabbing your a** in front a bunch of strangers just to get a high five from their buddies. :)

Maybe not romance, but still hope. :)