Looks like NCMO is a hot topic for all of you. Gee, I wonder why? ;-)
Ends up, after some discussion and psychoanalysis if you will, my friends have helped me to discover it isn't necessarily always the act of NCMO I have trouble with. Haven't we all dreamt of being swept away by a handsome romantic (or exotic beauty) on vacation? Or meeting someone thrilling at a party and becoming enraptured in each others' presence even though you know you'll be in different states the next morning? Or finally giving things a shot with that long-time friend to see if this is the magic moment where it all changes? (sometimes it does!) I gotta tell you, I would probably fall victim to NCMO in scenarios like this. Why? There is a difference between a one night hook up/giving things a chance and a NCMO/repeated booty call.
If both parties involved know it is just for physical gratification, the act is habitual, and there is no hope or intention on both sides, I continue to have all of the aforementioned issues and continue to find emotional and physical destruction. The real sticking point for me is that NCMO typically involves only one of the parties secretly wishing or hoping for more. One party who continues to believe that eventually one of these encounters will lead to something more. The other party tries to kid themselves into believing that repeated encounters are not resulting in any feelings of attachment. The circle of pretending, the lack of communication, is the crucial root of the destructiveness as I see it.
One of my friends also pointed out, "I think these people should be congratulated they are keeping NCMO's within the law of chastity! I say GOOD JOB for not having one night stands" Ha. Too true. I have to say, I thought about how extremely silly my thoughts on this may seem because, in many other cultures, kissing would be the least of my worries.
The best gem I received on the matter? Well, read it for yourself:
"I say enjoy life, kiss strangers but if that stranger keeps staring at you then they may have realized what they just ran into... and when that happens smile and stay a little longer in that moment. And believe that God created that moment for you. For you to experience love, because you are worth it, because you are beautiful, because you are a good kisser and your talents should be shared :)."