Saturday, April 16, 2011


I somehow manage to feel pigeon-holed by my stereotype way too frequently.  What is my stereotype?  Being a woman.

Amazingly enough, I've often heard, "You aren't the stereotypical theater person."  Little do those folks know that only about one of every twenty theater people I meet is actually that person.

Back to womanhood.  There are simple differences that make women women and men men.  There is a multi-billion dollar industry based upon trying to understand these differences.  I am a huge advocate of embracing the positives about the things that make us who we are.  Yet, the media and society has now included this whole realm of things that make a woman that are not naturally a part of "womanhood".

Naturally and unnaturally, there are a lot of things about being a woman that I adore and things that I abhor.

What are some of these things?

  • I have no desire in my body or mind at this time to produce babies.  The thought of being pregnant or having a baby is probably of what I am most afraid.  Because of the stereotypes I feel like people think there is something wrong with me because I feel this way.  Maybe there is, but I like to think there isn't.
  • I have a problem with crying.  It means I'm weak.  I am not weak.  Or it means, "Oh she's just crying because she's a girl," and people think I'm crying over nonsense because I'm a girl.  You cannot discount people's emotions like that!
  • I do not like scrapbooking, quilting, sewing, or any other types of craft. I don't have a problem with people who do, I just don't get pleasure from cutting out letters or taking an hour to label three photos.
  • Married men refer to their wives as "the old ball and chain."  Media has put forth this stigma that wives nag, prevent men from doing what they really want to, don't enjoy physical affection, are merely "putting up with" men, and many other negative traits.  I never want a man, especially the man to whom I am married, feeling this way about me.  My insecurities already abound, I'd rather just not get married at all.
  • I have no desire to plan a wedding reception.  If I could afford, with no pain at all, to hire a planner, I'm all for a rockin' party.  But I hear the word "wedding" and automatically become stressed.
  • TMI, but I don't suffer from PMS and have never had a cramp in my life.  I HATE it when a man says a woman is in a bad mood because it is "that time of the month."  Maybe it is just a bad day! 
  • Weakness physically.  Yes, mother nature made us a physically weaker sex, but I work out every day.  Don't assume I'm weak or not good at frisbee just because I'm a girl.  I love the shocked look on their faces when they realize I can bring it.
  • Cooking.  I love to cook, seriously.  And bake.  But I don't want to be expected to.   Men are often seen as not good at cooking, but I've encountered several who are quite tasty...their food that is.  I cook the way I like my food.  Given my affinity for fiber, whole wheat, "fake meat" products, and extremely hot/spicy foods, I'm pretty sure most people's palates don't agree with mine, but I sure love it.  And my homemade oreo's and chocolate chip cookies are pretty much famous.
  • Professional success.  I love that I have a great job.  I hate that I feel guilty when I let a chivalrous young man pay for my fun evening.  I don't really make more than your average bear, yet I've never dated a man with a higher salary.

  • Dresses.  Particularly cutesy, girly dresses.  I'd wear a dress every day if I had more casual wear.  So, I guess you can say I enjoy fashion. 
  • 4-inch high heels.  I feel powerful, confident, sexy, stylish.  I love the compliments from men and women when I wear them.
  • Being cute.  
  • Being short.  This makes me feel more protected in a man's arms. And gives me a great excuse to climb on the shelves in the grocery store.
  • Curves.  If I were a man, I'd definitely want me a curvy woman.  
  • Incredibly soft skin.  I loved this about my grandmother and my mother.  I thank them.
  • My long, flowing blonde tresses that will let me style them any way I want.  I lucked out.
  • Having a nurturing, caring instinct.
  • Nail polish.  My friend Amy once said that God must have known we women are attracted to all of the wonderful colors His world has to offer so he gave us lots of colors of nail polish to experiment with.
  • I love my kitty.  A lot.  I've literally had men tell me this means I will be a single, old cat lady.  Seriously?  Not allowed to like cats now?  I maintain my philosophy that 80% of all cats are indeed evil.  Mine is an angel whose only flaw is not coming when her name is called.  Unless this one man calls her.  She's in love with him and he has this odd power over her.  I'm non-existent when he's around.  But I know who she's going home with.
  • Smelling good.  I love clean, fresh smells.  I love that I am expected to smell that way.
  • Being asked on a date.  How wonderful is it when a man asks you if he can share an evening with you? 
I'm sure I could go on and on, but there are your surface-level frustrations or lack thereof.  And when it comes to the man I end up with?  He will appreciate the nurturing and compassionate nature I have as a woman and respect me for those things that make us different - appreciating the gentleness that he does not himself possess naturally.  He will not be that man who feels women suck the life out of men.  We don't.  We give it to them;-)

What stereotypes about men/women do you like/not like?


miss kristen said...

I'm built like a Barbie Doll. Always have been. I HATE that because I have big boobs, a small waist, and blonde hair (no joke-I'm a natural blonde and this is why I now choose to dye it brown) automatically makes me an idiot.

Then you get the jerks that think you're incapable of doing anything just because you're a girl. There's a lot I can't do yes, but even more I CAN. And I will do it just to prove I can.

Sheldon said...

Aww...Conor and her little "man crush"! Although I think electronics still trumps her "man crush".