Thursday, March 24, 2011

Disclaimer: Blog Reader Beware

I have a disclaimer to make to all of those reading.

What I write about is what has made my life the happiest, what has worked best for me.

Will these gems of wisdom I share work for all of you?  Maybe.  Maybe not.  That is for you to think about and decide.  Each individual is unique and needs something different.  When you have a favorite treat, you want everyone to try that treat just because you love it so much and it makes you happy and you want everyone to experience the deliciousness, right?   I want to share with each of you the deliciousness of my world that has made me head-over-heels in love with life. 

You will notice my blog is pretty self-centered and "I, me, my, me, me, I, I, my."  I don't like like this, yet...there it is.  My experiences and life-lessons are the only ones of which I have a firm grasp, therefore the only ones I comfortably share in an all-knowing manner.

When it comes to my dating philosophies?  Those are the things you need to carefully reflect within yourself the most.  I don't want to give someone impressionable the wrong ideas.  Granted, in my (there it is again) life, these are the ideas that work.  We all have our own opinions and are quite entitled to them.   Feel free to express yours, as I clearly express mine.  And, please note, my opinions are constantly changing.

I may or may not have been misinterpreted as to my intentions.  One of my readers informed me in a kind and straight-forward manner (to which I may have very negatively reacted) that I come across as if I want a man to worship me.  That I am going to pass up an opportunity if a man feels like he is actually good enough for me or if he hasn't asked me out in the first few weeks we know each other.  I apologize if I have given any of you that impression. 

I simply seriously want a man who can treat me as good as I treat myself or as good as my friends treat me.  Someone who is at least on level playing ground with me.  I have been through a lot if shiz with men prior to the past two and a half years.  Some snippets?  Men telling me I'm fat, swearing at me, telling me I'm selfish, telling me that if we end up together they will cheat on me, telling me they don't even like me as a friend, telling me I'm not talented at all, calling me stupid repeatedly, knowing my standards yet asking me to touch "it," telling me they aren't attracted to me, telling me I'm too spiritual, telling me I'm not spiritual enough, telling me I am too organized, telling me I am irresponsible, telling me my dedication to Gym will never last (6.5 years strong, baby!), etc. etc. etc.  And these were all men I dated before I changed my philosophies that I share with you. 

Maybe my wishes to be with a man that I can look up to come off wrong.  I want a man to look up to me, but I want to equally look up to him.  I want balance and reciprocity.  I want to be in awe of his characteristics and just hope he returns the favor.  Perhaps I'm living in a Disney movie....but I'll hit the reality ceiling and come crashing down eventually and then I can say I learned my lesson.  That, however, is a lesson I need to learn.  I don't know.  If we knew everything about our lives, where would the adventure and excitement be?  Isn't the unknown and the possibilities of a dream what keeps us moving?  Is it too much to ask that a man make an effort for me?  If it is, I will gladly remain single because my life would not feel complete with someone who has so little ambition he can't even attempt to let me know how he feels about me.  Don't we all deserve as much, man or woman?  I sincerely believe it isn't too much.  Those who know me know that I will make a full return of the initial effort ten-fold. 

You know, maybe I'm just scared spitless and my "philosophies" give me a sense of a control even though I know I ultimately have none.

Just take everything you read on my blog with a grain of salt, readers, please. 

That's my disclaimer.  Over and out.


Unknown said...

Blog's are the epitome of personal thought. No worries there. :) I don't think it is Disney to hope to find someone that you think is the bees knees and knowing that the feeling is completely mutual. I catch myself waiting for the "other shoe to drop" in relationships all the time, and have to stop myself right out. I am glad that you are no longer being treated as horrifying as you have mentioned by men. That being said I say hold onto the dream of a relationship that you feel like an equal in. :)
At the same time I forget how guys are just as afraid of breaking their heart as we are, and of being shot down, and finding the right one and putting themselves out there so some of them may take a moment to ask such an especially amazing girl like you out. So it may take your man a bit longer to get you, but he'll get there :)
love you!!

Willem said...

Good post. Your point comes through quite clearly . Only sad to hear what you`ve gone through with guys in general. I don`t think your expectations are that high because when the real thing happens i reckon it will be a million times better than what you imagined, i imagine. It seems like i`m saying the opposite to what i said in the last post but having read what your recent post i see things differently as i have not had such bad experiences.
Thanks for the post you`ve made me really think . But at the same time just become more confused.
I will beware next time i guess you want this to be more of your platform which is good because your take on yourself is entertaining but that`s half the fun being challenged?