Closer Proximity Sweaters

What is the deal with those people in the gym who jump on a cardio machine six inches away from you on the right even though there are a dozen empty machines in a row to your left?  Is there an explanation for this phenomenon?  There has to have been some kind of a study or sociological experiment done on this...

Never you mind that.  I've got a trick up my sleeve to rid myself of the unwanted close-proximity runner.

Cough. 

They linger?  Fake cough again every minute or so - sound like you are hacking up something.  Sure, it'll take some of your running energy away, but it'll get rid of 'em.  Yes, I'm serious.  Yes, I've done this - I am not ashamed.  Okay, maybe a little, but the entire cardio cinema was empty and crazy talker on the phone lady plops next to me?  Oh, Honey, I don't think so! 

On a side note, watching the end of Marley and Me while running, if you are a pet lover, is not a good idea.

Yep, this is even my gym!