ATTENTION Male Readers

Curves.

You like them, right?

See, I've long said that if I were a man, I'd like me a curvy woman.  I cannot describe how attractive a healthy woman is, someone who glows inside out because she is healthy and happy.  We have, especially as of late, seen report after report saying men would prefer someone slightly overweight versus slightly underweight. 

Like in this photo below, you can see the firm, rounded muscles under Beyonce's skin.  I find this so much more attractive than skin on bone even if you can see the tiny muscles.

So, what I want to know is, is this true?  Men, what do you think?

Feel free to comment anonymously.

Talent is Hot

That pretty much sums it up.

A beautiful singing voice can turn ugly into hottie.

Wicked mad athletic skills can turn skinny nerd into stud.

Social graces and hosting skills can turn Joe Schmo into "I must get to know."

Right?

Overweight Date

I have felt judgmental for quite some time regarding my lack of attraction to overweight and/or non-physically active men.  Judge me, that's fine.  I am not attracted to men carrying additional poundage who are not doing anything to remedy the situation.  But why?  This has really bothered me and made me feel superficial and unwilling to "give someone a chance" as we are so often counseled.

I'm a big advocate of needing to be attracted to your significant other.  Eventually, you will want to participate in some activities that, let's face it, require feelings more than, "He's such a great guy..."  Yeah, you know.  And do you want to be with someone who you know has had to learn to be attracted to you?  No!  You want someone who thinks you are a hottie Mchothot with a shake and fries! 

My eyes have recently been opened to the answer to this woe and I feel a little less of, "Larissa, you are a horrible person."  My mother, my uncle, and all of his children have struggled with obesity.  Even my dad was overweight for a few years even though he is now one of the fittest, healthiest people you will ever encounter.  My mother and uncle have both had no choice but to have a gastric bypass because their health issues were so severe and in such immediate need of remedy.  I remember sitting on my bed in Ohio, sobbing as my father held me, telling him I didn't want my children to not know their grandmother just because she liked food.  I have had my entire life to watch almost my entire family struggle with the unhealthy yo-yo diets and the effects of overweightness/obesity - I do not want that for my future. 

Not only have I had to watch them, I have had to experience this struggle first-hand.  I had a doctor tell me, straight up, "I am afraid for your body because of everything you do at your weight.  Your body cannot handle this, you are going to hurt yourself."  Tell me that wouldn't scare you straight.

If I see an overweight man, I take that to be indicative of his eating and activity habits - the same habits that have lead my family to so much heartache (figuratively and literally).  I also see that being healthy is most likely going to be an uphill battle.  I have battled so hard and for so long that I cannot willingly put myself with a catalyst for more struggle and the possibility of falling into old habits and destroying everything I've overcome.

I do not want that for myself.  I do not want that for my future family.  The man I end up with deserves more than to know I resent him because of his passion for food and lack thereof for physical activity.  He deserves more than to know he is causing me mental and physical pain. 

I honestly feel the costs outweigh the potential benefits.  I feel the need to share because so many people have wondered how I could write people off even though I have myself been overweight in the past.  So many people wonder how this kind of life change effects you outside of your diet/exercise regime.  If I can see a clear, concerted effort and lasting results, I can convince myself to reconsider, but, friends, this is a mental block I cannot hurdle.  I hope you understand.

Singles Ward Hopper: What is Wrong with Women in Singles Wards?

I happened upon this intriguing site yesterday while doing a search to see if the new boundaries for the singles ward restructurings were published.
(by the way, if you need to know what singles ward you are in, go here)

I have no idea how current the site is.  What I do know is that it is hilarious.  And harsh.  

The author, an anonymous thirty-two year old single male lawyer living in Salt Lake City, has been to every ward in the Valley and offers some answers to interesting questions:

How do you know you are at a singles ward?
What do you think of singles wards?
What do you think of singles ward Bishopric's?
Are you inactive? Do you have a testimony?

And, my favorite question, "What is wrong with the girls in singles wards?"

His answer is a slap across the face and I'd like to see what you all think (I've pulled only excerpts, go to his site for a full read-through):

"Two thirds of the young women are overweight.  These girls all think that because they have good personalities, or good jobs, or are well-educated that guys should care more about who they are than how they look.... young men will never want to be intimate with them if they're ... heavy...While beauty isn't the only important thing in a girl, it is the gateway to the other qualities which no man cares about exploring without the attraction...  Like men, women have an obligation to be happy, to procreate, to start a family, to experience humanity and love...Nobody would have wanted to kiss Sleeping Beauty if she were a fatty with a Ph.d.  ...you can't start a fire without a spark."

"The other third of the girls who aren't overweight have a different problem, which I'll illustrate by describing what happens when I go to dinner with them.  We sit down at a nice dinner, and they begin to talk about somebody who's suffering some medical or emotional problem.  They then begin to extol the virtues of holistic/herbal medicine and animal rights, which apparently this person who's suffering doesn't understand.  I nod in increasing frustration as they begin to praise vegetarianism...seems like many LDS women who aren't married seek to identify with bizarre belief systems, as if these beliefs have become their spouses, to the point they become blind to real life.  I am amazed how many women spend all dinner telling me about pharmaceutical companies conspiring to cover up a cure for cancer that holistic doctors have discovered, or who refuse to eat because they are doing "cleanses" with exotic fruit juices, as if somehow these fruit cleansers form covalent bonds with all the toxins in their bodies and clean them out...All of these beliefs have somehow replaced these women's testimonies and retarded their ability to appreciate and interact with traditional, non-artsy, down-to-earth males..."

"Then, there is another pervasive problem that I observe across LDS women before going on dates . . . pride....The girls start behaving in YSA wards like they did in high school, forming clicks, and deciding which groups of people they'll socialize with and which they won't...in which many of the best men in the YSA wards are overlooked because they refuse to participate in the superficiality, or lack the time or inclination to do so."

"The men, of course, have problems too, but not as many in my opinion.  They're overweight also, and some are generally losers...I don't think weight matters as much for men, though, even though I recognize the double-standard...  The biggest problem I've noticed with men as they get older in singles wards is they begin blaming their unhappiness in life on their parents rather than trying to change whatever is causing it themselves."

Interesting, no?  What do you think?  Feel free to comment anonymously;-)