Rejecting Faith

I am bothered when people present, "questioning faith" as a negative.

Questioning and curiosity are part of human nature.  Without questions, we would never learn.  Without questions, man never would have explored space, never would have adventured into the unknown parts of the world,  never would have invented the iPhone.

Is faith something you establish once, all at one time, and then any deviation from your initial thought is considered a questioning and rejection of your faith?  Certainly my faith in God now is entirely different than it was as a child.

Faith is something that grows and changes every moment.  How is it possible to view this process negatively?

Another oft-used term is, "rejection."  I do not see how any existence of belief in God or a higher power is a rejection of faith.  Perhaps your particular path to commune with God has changed, or your belief in the expectations He has for you in this life, but does that really call for the label that you have "rejected" faith?

Why does a realization that your path may be different than you once thought have to have so much negativity attached?   As a child, I told everyone I encountered that I was going to be a "Vegetarian" when I grew up so I could take care of animals every day.  Once I Iearned the accurate term of "Veterinarian," and that I'd also be responsible for putting animals down, I changed my mind.  No one criticized me for abandoning my future career path and I received much encouragement to continue searching.

Most often, the members of the sect of faith that is being questioned are the ones who object.  Last year, an article was published about how some Malawi girls are forced to have sex with a man, known as a "hyena," after their first period.  This act is believed, in their faith, to be a sexual cleansing and to keep the family safe from diseases and disaster.  If a girl refuses this, she does not know what calamities will befall her family.  In their culture, rejecting that faith is a terrible thing.  But to those of us on the outside, we see rejection of those beliefs as life-saving and liberating.

If a person changes from Catholic to Protestant to LDS to Non-Denominational, that person is not a rejector of faith 4 times over.  That person is human and curious and constantly searching for their individual path to a higher power.

We are all simply trying to find our personal way to most connect with the divine.  I truly believe that path is different for each one of us.  I truly believe that our higher power knows we are human and prone to err.  I truly believe that we are all on earth to love and be loved.


* http://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-36843769?ocid=socialflow_twitter

To See the Face of God

I know that there is a higher power that loves and watches over me.

To most Americans, God is our higher power.  For others, that power is Krishna, Buddha, Zeus, the list goes on.  Reading this knowing that God is my higher power, imagine whatever is your higher power.

Because of the great example of unconditional love that my earthly father sets for me, I am certain that my Heavenly Father is guiding my paths and protecting me daily.  My center, my constant, is knowing there is a higher power in the universe.  Several personal events have occurred in my life that leave me with no question as to the existence of higher power – the impossible has been made possible, the warmth of comfort has spread over me like a blanket in times of cold despair. 

Gymnastics changed my life.  More importantly, my gymnastics coach, Pastor Brian Anderson, changed my life.   I sometimes feel I use the analogy of the gymnastics coach too often, but I can’t stop seeing everything crystal clearly in these terms.  Imagine God as your gymnastics coach.  He teaches you strength-building conditioning, flexibility exercises, drills for form and stamina all before teaching you actual gymnastics skills because you need a foundation to build upon.  Once he teaches you a skill, he will stand there, spotting you with all the strength he has to help you successfully complete the task at hand without falling.  Once he knows in his gut you can do it on your own, he steps away.  What happens then?  Well, most often what happens at least once is that our faces, hineys, or bellies end up on the floor in a heap.  For our own betterment, the coach watches us fall.  He is there to scoop us up in his arms in times of true, desperate injury, however most often we are merely bumped or bruised.  In my own experiences as a coach, this was the most difficult thing for me, yet I knew if I didn’t step back and let the gymnasts try the skills on their own, they would never learn to succeed.  What I wanted more than anything was to step in and protect them!  But what brought me joy unlike any other was watching those moments the gymnasts succeeded!  The look on someone’s face as they complete their first handspring vault and you both run towards each other squealing and jumping up and down is pure bliss.      

I imagine my father in heaven much the same way – teaching us the foundation principles, giving us guidance and help, yet stepping back so we can truly learn what this life is all about.  Will we fall?  Absolutely.  The key is to get back up and keep trying instead of laying there in that miserable lump cursing the coach who let us fall.   Much like the coach who watches us stand on the end of the balance beam, hesitant to try a back-tuck dismount for the first time, God is empathetic and understanding of each decision we make and why…he knows our hesitancies, our discomforts, our strengths. 

Some of you out there wonder how God could let children be harmed, how He could let loving parents die in car accidents, how He could let pure evil like Hitler reign.  I do not have answers for that.  I wish I did.     

What I can say is that I have a divinity inside of me.  Many times I have been pulled aside and hugged in a tearful embrace as someone shares with me how grateful they are for the influence of the goodness and light that radiate from me.  When I was 17, a man who appeared to be ancient to me placed his arms upon my shoulders, piercingly looked into my eyes and said, “The eyes are the gateway to the soul.  You have beautiful eyes.  You have a beautiful soul.”  This light is a gift, a blessing.  Again, I cannot answer as to why my life has been gifted this and not gifted to an afflicted child in a third-world country.  The answer is beyond my comprehension. 

I share this with you because the events of the world have left me torn and confused for many years.  There are ideas and principles in the LDS church that I don’t understand or agree with.  I have a desire of knowledge, although I am far from a knowledge in most things.  But above all else, I firmly know my Heavenly Father loves me.  I know he loves every single one of us in a way that is absolutely incomprehensible to us.  I know my life is wonderfully blessed because of the principles and guidelines I have followed as a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.  There is a place for everyone in the Church if they want it.  Whether in 100% agreement or not, I know this is where I need to be.  I know that we fumble around on this earth and as long as we are trying to, wanting to be good people, the Lord will understand.  To love another person is truly to see the face of God.  To love another person is the divine higher power in each of us.  

To Trust

"Never trust a woman.  More importantly, never trust a man."

A friend of mine posted this quote awhile back.  While I understand the intent is humorous, it saddens my heart a little.  

I like to think I am a very trustworthy woman.  I also like to think that there is a man out there with whom I can trust my life.  In fact, I know it. 

Yes, my trust has been violated by men and women I love.  I have been hurt to the point of wondering if I ever could trust again.  Yet, we are all blessed with a remarkable capacity to love.  We can choose to stay static, dwelling on the hurt and betrayal, or we can choose to move forward full of hope that we will be able to surround ourselves with those who will cherish us as we all deserve.  

I think back on my days in gymnastics.  I never would have progressed in my skills if I hadn't trusted my coach.  He gave me all the little tips I needed to prepare and trust in myself as much as I could, but that first time he asked me to jump in the air and flip backwards at break-neck speed/height, I needed him.  I could not do it alone and had to trust that he would be there to catch me if I fell.  If I didn't trust, I never would have learned to do a back tuck.  If I fell once and refused to try again?  Same story - I never would have progressed.

We can do great things alone, but together we can accomplish so much more.  

Trust.  Be trusted.  It's worth it.

Trust Your Gut

Have you ever known the outcome of a situation well before it happens or have just known you are, without logical reason, supposed to do one thing instead of the other?  

I received a bit of news last week, and made another decision, contrary to my wants.  If I were making the road map for my life, these directions would not be included.  Yet I knew bit one before I received the news and I know the other decision is right even though I will not see the consequences of my choice for a couple of months to come.

How do I know?

I decided to trust my gut and not second guess myself.   Even though some could construe these bits as negative, I'm ridiculously excited.

Why? 

I can trust my gut even when it isn't exactly the outcome I'd prefer!

Neither of the things I'm mentioning are in reference to romantical interludes, just to give that lil disclaimer to Nosy McNosersons.  I learned a couple of years ago that when a certain feeling hits my gut in romantic situations (in spite of my heart and my head), the relationship will soon come to a close - even if nothing up to that point would indicate anything but progression.  I appreciate having that little heads up for the ole ticker.

But trusting my gut in every day life situations?  Hot dog!  This is a new experience for me and it is pretty darned cool!